[Recruiting] Absinthe | Level 100+ | 1000+ minimum donations | Continuous Wars

[ChiefAvalanche]

S!las are you recruiting for your clan in our recruitment thread

[ChiefAvalanche]

Karate? The Dane Cook of martial arts? No, ISIS agents use Krav Maga.

[ChiefAvalanche]

Do you want ants? Because thats how you get ants!

[ChiefAvalanche]

I have to go, but if I find one dog hair when I come back I'll rub sand into your dead little eyes. I also need you to buy sand. I don't know if they grade it, but ... coarse.

[ChiefAvalanche]

Because I told you to buy lemon curd, Woodhouse. Now what am I going to spread on my toast? Your tears?"

[ChiefAvalanche]

No Cyril, when they're dead, they're just hookers!

[ChiefAvalanche]

Gee, I don't know. Maybe deep down I'm afraid of any apex predator that lived through the K-T extinction. Physically unchanged for a hundred million years, because it's the perfect killing machine. A half ton of cold-blooded fury, the bite force of 20,000 Newtons, and stomach acid so strong it can dissolve bones and hoofs.

[ChiefAvalanche]

Lana. Lana. Lana? LANA! Danger zone.

[ChiefAvalanche]

Astronaut training sucks complete @$$. Literally. What is the deal with all the enemas?

[ChiefAvalanche]

Well, you were hysterical, Lana, so I thought the best thing to do would be inject you with a tranquilizer, drive you to a private air field, put you on a CIA plane, fly you overnight to Wales, and then...that brings us to now.