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Thread: Recruiting Issues: let's hear both sides

  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by WussyPuss View Post
    My second farm is a “hood hopper”

    since adopting the farm from my daughter, it has played many roles, originally running delayed start experiments and the like.

    i did not want it as a feeder farm or a second farm in my hood. I like visiting friends and forumites, seeing different derbies and strategies.

    for those with issues keeping members, are you forgiving when mistakes are made? I ask this because I have been in a situation where I was made to feel responsible for something and it is hard to get past, feeling that it is hanging over me.

    i am just trying to figure out why some good people leave with seemingly no explanation and what it is like to be the new person.
    i am also a hood-hopper...tho i like to call it "visiting" because a "hopper" infers negative connotations (disloyalty/lack of commitment) whereas "visiting" suggests exactly what it is...i'm out on the prowl, i'm visiting friends, and i'll be back! maybe i was a cat in a previous life lol
    a friend on here referred to it as "not liking to be owned" and i concur with that wholeheartedly...after all, we choose to be in any given NH.

    from what i have been able to surmise "hood-hopping" is frowned upon...in part, i can see it...that chance for organic growth as a team is undermined and there is a potential for it being disruptive to the general cohesion within the group.
    despite recognising and appreciating the above, i am a strong proponent of visiting friends/other hoods...(just to see how other folks are doing things, is great for growth!)... any strong, confident, self-assured group, should be able to withstand the personalities that like to come and go, and come back again.
    after all people like me, are few and far between, and as there are so very many more of You(!), surely you will allow me my proclivities!?!
    very very luckily for me, my group leader is the understanding sort and allows me my little peccadilloes

    anyways, i responded to this thread because i felt i could contribute to the following;

    Quote Originally Posted by WussyPuss View Post
    i am just trying to figure out why some good people leave with seemingly no explanation and what it is like to be the new person.
    the first reason that came to me as i read the above was, plain and simple, the person that left doesn't like someone within the group and/or the group culture...people/groups are organic...changes may have happened incrementally and a member decided that it wasn't a change for the better.
    and at the end of the day, explanations are not a god-given right...this is just a game regardless of the investments made...a good fit takes time but we live in a disposable culture and it's just easier, wrongly or rightly, to just quit and look elsewhere...
    also, ime, people are not always great at bringing up a subject that is likely to cause strife. be it publicly, or privately. especially if the person on the other side of the equation is a bad listener/unwilling to accept/cede, on how someone else is feeling.

    on the subject of being new...if a newcomer joins a long established group then no matter how welcoming the group, that air of cliquishness can-not be denied.
    this isn't a criticism, just a statement of fact. most longer established groups as a "collective" are probably unaware of how they come across. long association will do that. for the newcomer however, it's daunting... and it comes down to how much time and effort is one willing to expend to stay? to "fit?", especially when there are so many more groups out there that will be easier to establish oneself in.
    i can be generous, my low level permitting, i will donate and help (requests/crates etc) as much as i can...in fact i can remember someone in my current group thinking i donated as much as i do to "fit-in" lol...but that's not how i operate...

    how does one "fit-in" then? for me, i set about trying to "fit" by just being me and biding my time...knowing what you want from a group is as important as what a group wants from you. both sides have value, no one side being greater or lesser than the other.
    that sounds like a non-answer but my attitude with groups is rather straight forward...i'm either going to like you, and you me...or it's not going to work. critically, i think some newcomers don't give something enough "time"...they expect instant acceptance. i can remember a rather high level player joining after i did, gradually losing her confidence and alienating herself within my current group because she was looking for that "instant-acceptance"...as an aside, she was a mite strange but i don't know if how she felt (gradual alienation) brought that on, or she really was like that...she eventually went postal and was evicted, mind.

    being new can be tough. how the group do things may not be how you would do things. even simple little things like thanking a longtime member first, before they thank you, even tho you helped first...makes a difference. sounds silly, right? but that right there is hierarchy at play...you are being reminded that you are new ...that they are more comfortable with each other first, before they are with you. it's natural and it has to be borne but, that's what being new is like...

    and to think this is "just a game"

  2. #22
    WussyPuss's Avatar
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    Thanks for you udderly frank reply!

    I wince at recruiting that says “no hood hoppers”... I just like visiting right now
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  3. #23
    Senior Member Paulettes's Avatar
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    Thank you all for your replies and views.

    In short I think I've tried most of the things you're all suggesting, and can now say as we are about to enter champions league seem to have the beginnings of a good team. Most are still fairly quiet and seem to prefer to not chat, but that's ok, and when they're on we have friendly banter which is great.

    Interesting to to read about "hood hoppers" and I have no issues at all with this, in fact the concept quite appeals. What I am averse to are those who join with HUGE enthusiasm, whip the team into a frenzy then leave without as much as a goodbye, or those who leave a team that are trying real hard mid Derby and in doing so scupper their end results, game or not this is just rude I think, and is very unsettling on the team, especially when it's building from new.
    Last edited by Paulettes; January 14th, 2018 at 11:21 AM.

  4. #24
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    I guess with ‘hood hoppers’ everything depends on what you’re trying to build in the early life of a hood. To develop a proper team spirit you really need a stable core to the hood, so people coming and going isn’t conducive to developing that.

    My hood has been running around 3 years now and is large and stable, even now I will rarely welcome ‘visitors’, and then they will only be trusted friends who I know will do nothing to disrupt the team ethos we have. Ironically I’d love to go touring some friends hoods to see how they do things and learn how we might be a better hood.

  5. #25
    Senior Member Paulettes's Avatar
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    Spot on, thank you MDFC, sound advice as always ��

  6. #26
    Hi, I have same problems with that but I wish I could block a person not on a friend list but in the group itself because I have someone join waits to collect derby prizes and not participate in the derby second time I booted them out before the Derby was over after they rejoined waited to see if they would participate I told them to participate but no answer I removed them again then after they rejoined , Then I put to request but someone without knowledge accepted that player again , can’t get rid of them Lol..I always wait a day before derby ends if I get a new player to see if they are squatters trying to collect prizes then I remove them , Also when new players join I don’t fall for that complete boat or request then after leave , I don’t help if they don’t help or stick around ,Well Thank you
    Best
    Betty

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by BettyDayHay View Post
    Hi, I have same problems with that but I wish I could block a person not on a friend list but in the group itself because I have someone join waits to collect derby prizes and not participate in the derby second time I booted them out before the Derby was over after they rejoined waited to see if they would participate I told them to participate but no answer I removed them again then after they rejoined , Then I put to request but someone without knowledge accepted that player again , can’t get rid of them Lol..I always wait a day before derby ends if I get a new player to see if they are squatters trying to collect prizes then I remove them , Also when new players join I don’t fall for that complete boat or request then after leave , I don’t help if they don’t help or stick around ,Well Thank you
    Best
    Betty
    Betty you can change your hood settings to ‘Invite only’. That way you have much better control over who gets in. If not, you could check to see if your problem player has joined the hood on a Monday. Boot them out a couple of hours before derby starts and change to ‘invite only’. Once derby has started you can change back because they can’t join and get derby prizes at that point. You do of course have the option to boot this player before the end of the derby, that way they will not get the prizes the6 appear to be seeking.
    Steve: Hayday Leader JT Legend #J2JOLG2. 150+ golds “Team first, my barn is your barn”
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  8. #28
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    Omgosh I'm having exactly the same issues. We are so small and I'm the only one who really chats. We are good solid players but different time zones and lack of chat seems to be the main issue. I've had a few join a leave rather quickly. I'm so frustrated. We'd be back up to a decent size if the players who have joined and left would just stay.

  9. #29
    Help I really need an active neighbourhood 😣 that talks etc !!!
    Last edited by Lexy32; January 27th, 2018 at 11:50 AM.

  10. #30
    WussyPuss's Avatar
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    I have to say I have never looked in the thread about people looking for a hood until today and I am flabbergasted

    if someone says they are looking for a less demanding hood, cannot do 9 x 320 tasks, then why are people replying that demand 9 x 320?

    worse yet, why are people posting recruitment ads in these threads?



    if someone says they talk game, but not much else, why say “come join us... must be chatty!” ?


    poor communication is probably started right there
    Last edited by WussyPuss; January 28th, 2018 at 09:45 PM.
    Farm 140
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    established level 16 clan seeking willing warriors, donators and clan games enthusiasts

    Need a Siege Machine/Donate a Siege Machine...

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