But bit verbose, but that was fun to read. Interesting way to get your clan back. Good to see you weren't stupid enough to actually carry out that "Crimsom Skies" nonsense as the main way to get your clan back.
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But bit verbose, but that was fun to read. Interesting way to get your clan back. Good to see you weren't stupid enough to actually carry out that "Crimsom Skies" nonsense as the main way to get your clan back.
HAIL THOR!
HAIL TO THE TRIUMPHANT BEAR EMPIRE!
And now, time for mead and merriment! B^)
My God, it's full of stars.Quote:
Originally Posted by Cavebears
Now it can be told.
The Official History of the Bear Empire Civil War. Here is the secret story behind the glorious victory of the Bear Empire.
When it came to our attention that Corugi had unlawfully seized control of the Icebears, our reaction was swift. We immediately began to infiltrate the Icebears with highly experienced Bear agents. Thanks to the efforts of Tanys, the Bear Empire is able to maintain a system of private inter-clan communications, allowing members to remain in touch even though they might be spread out through different and sometimes hostile clans.
INFILTRATION
The first agent to infiltrate was the redoubtable KC99. He took the role of a conciliator, attempting to patch up the differences between the rebellious Icebears and the rest of the Bear Empire. His real role was of course quite different. He reported back to us on the recruiting methods of Corugi, the structure of the clan, the nature of its members, and the loyalty of the new Icebear recruits to Corugi.
It became rapidly apparent that the clan was chaotic. Corugi was recruiting heavily from global. He was promoting everyone to Elder. There was no structure. There were no rules. People were donating anything (including wall breakers) or not at all. The recruits were young, inexperienced, and frequently inactive. We gauged then that many of the new recruits had no idea that their clan was even in a state of revolt.
Given that, we knew we could easily infiltrate the Icebears with yet more agents. We watched Corugi, and slowly but surely we drew our plans against him.
The next agent to infiltrate Icebears was the indefatigable Magnificio (or "Mags", as we so fondly call her). Her role was to play a sycophant, to help and assist Corugi in every way. To help new recruits, to donate often to make them stay, to pander to Corugi's ego, and to appear to hold a grudge against me and the Bear Empire. To that effect she even posted "hate" messages in our threads, telling us how bad we were and disrespecting us in general. We knew Corugi was active in the forums and we hoped he would read and be impressed by Mag's messages of disdain for us.
However, Mags real role was of course quite different. Along with KC99 she would monitor developments in the Icebears clan, but she would also work hard to ingrate herself with Corugi, gain his trust to such an extent that should he commit any mistake or lapse in judgement, she would be ready to pounce and take advantage of it.
BEAR COMMANDOS
Soon a crack team of elite Bear Commando agents had infiltrated Icebears. The fabulous 456 ( or "four" as I call her) quickly followed Mags. Her role was to act like a simple foot soldier, saying nothing much, just obeying. However 456's real role was of course quite different. Trained to black belt level in the art of lurking, 456 would silently observe the chat log, donate troops like a loyal member and support Mags in a logistics role, providing intelligent conversation whenever the level of mediocrity of chat in the clan began to drive Mags totally bonkers.
In a similar support role our agent, the invincible Manu was inserted into Icebears. He would play the role of a staunch Corugi supporter, attempting to beef up the new Icebear recruits for the forthcoming war, but the reality was quite different. He would be waiting in the wings, ready to help restore law and order once we were ready to retake the Icebears. We were now preparing to launch our counter offensive.
PROPAGANDA CAMPAIGN
We knew this war would involve as much winning the hearts and minds of the general population of the Icebear clan as defeating Corugi himself. To this effect the talented avatarist Leech designed a poster of Corugi, labelling him as a clan snatcher. Likewise vitriolic posts were made on the forums by the famous Rowan, denouncing Corugi for the villain he is.
MILITARY OFFENSIVE
The code name for the miltary offensive was called "Crimson Sky". This called for search and destroy missions by Bear Empire members against rebel bases. It was designed to spread panic and despondency among the Icebear members. HOLY FUDGE! Did you guys think this was serious? It was a complete sham, of course! "A military offensive"? LOL. As if we were really going to spend countless hours looking for an Icebear village just to inflict a 39% damage rate on some nub. Oh my aching sides! But there was a reason for this deception. We announced the formation of a special bear clan called Skybears which would specialise insearch and destroy missions against the rebel Icebear villages. The real role of Skybears of course was quite different. Skybears would be our new trophy hunting clan, lead by the esteemed Spechi, Skybears was designed to goad Corugi into forming another clan.
STRATEGY FOR SUCCESS
Our only chance of success lay in coaxing Corugi out of the Icebears clan. To this effect we knew we had to help him grow the Icebears clan to such numbers that it ran out of room to take any new recruits. We figured that if we could covertly add stability to the clan through the efforts of our agents who would also help recruit new members into Icebears, this might well induce Corugi into creating another clan. To assist this provoked Corugi with threats of military action, the creation of Skybears, the formation of alliances against him, and our propaganda efforts. Our agents within Icebears encouraged him to this end, urging him to expand, yet cleverly demeaning themselves so as not to appear too ambitious. We knew this would likely play to Corugi's swollen ego and his inflated sense of self importance. His clan was big, it expanded to near capacity within three days, but it was rotten to the core. Just one good kick and the whole rotten edifice would come crumbling down.
So our agents within Icebears tirelessly recruited more and more members into Icebears, for this they deserve an award. For they were recruiting from Global Chat, a seething cesspool containing the worse distillation of Humanity ever seen. Relentlessly our agents donated to the new recruits, feeding their insatiable hunger for troops, as a means for retaining these starving masses within the ranks of the Icebears. Relentlessly they fed Corugi's ego, telling him how much they hated the Bear Empire, but also voicing their fears that a terrible retribution would be visited upon the Icebears unless it too expanded into a multi-clan Empire.
OPERATION VIKING DAWN
It didnt take long for our plans to come to fruitition. Within an astonishing three days the Icebears clan had grown to nearly 50 members. The final phase of our plan was ready. In this final phase, Operation Viking Dawn, another team of crack Bear Commandoes would suddenly infiltrate Icebears, filling it to maximum capacity. Coinciding with this would be the announcement of totally fictitious accounts of successful raids on Icebear villages by the Skybears clan. This, we hoped would be the tipping point. In the early hours of the morning our crack bear Commandos, the indomitable Bob Fossil and the worthy Nicholas Cage joined Icebears. It was now full. We waited for Corugi to crack under the pressure.
THE CRUCIBLE
By this time Mags had received a private message from Corugi, thanking her for her support, and indicating he was going to form a new clan. The trap was set. Would the rat take the bait? We waited on the edges of our seats. Then the news was announced! Corugi was going to form a new clan called Pandabears, in honour of the member he had decided to "co-lead" it with. All this information was being relayed through our secret communication channels, Corugi had no idea he was being so carefully watched.
Who would Corugi choose to lead Icebears in his absence? For here now was what all our plans relied upon, all our efforts. Would Corugi trust those who had done so much to support and help him, or would he choose one of the rabble he had collected from Global chat? We waited, scarcely daring to draw breathe.
He choose Mags to lead the Icebears.
VICTORY! IN ALL BUT NAME!
Corugi then went and created Pandabears. He was still, to our knowledge, blissfully unaware of the magnitude of his mistake. He had now handed control of a full clan right back into the hands of one of our members! Immediately rejoicing filled the bear Empire Camps! The tyrant was deposed in all but name! But there remained one last chapter to be written in this harrowing tale.
RETRIBUTION SERVED UPON CORUGI
I soon joined Icebears upon hearing of Mags success. For a day we retained the appearance that all was as usual, Corugi obviously paid scant attention to the Icebears clans for he did not seem to notice that I was now listed among its members. To finish off this treacherous dog, Mags sent him a private message urging him to return to Icebears, declaring that Bear infiltrators were attempting to take it back. Corugi foolishly heeded her warning without first checking with anyone else in the clan. He arrived back, doubtlessly expecting to be re-promoted to Leader. Instead he found himself facing the retribution of the Bear Elders and myself. Mags immediately promoted me to leader and thus Corugi knew he was surely doomed. Swiftly we took him to the very highest cliff in the land, and, without a pillow, flung his rotten carcass off the edge and watched it splat upon the sharp and pointy rocks below.
So thus ended the greatest threat ever faced by the BEAR EMPIRE!
VICTORY WAS OURS!
BY THE GRACE OF THOR!
HAIL THE BEAR EMPIRE!
HAIL!
Good to see that Bears woke up on time and got the clan back. Keep up the good work.Quote:
Originally Posted by CavebearsNow it can be told.
The Official History of the Bear Empire Civil War. Here is the secret story behind the glorious victory of the Bear Empire.
When it came to our attention that Corugi had unlawfully seized control of the Icebears, our reaction was swift. We immediately began to infiltrate the Icebears with highly experienced Bear agents. Thanks to the efforts of Tanys, the Bear Empire is able to maintain a system of private inter-clan communications, allowing members to remain in touch even though they might be spread out through different and sometimes hostile clans.
INFILTRATION
The first agent to infiltrate was the redoubtable KC99. He took the role of a conciliator, attempting to patch up the differences between the rebellious Icebears and the rest of the Bear Empire. His real role was of course quite different. He reported back to us on the recruiting methods of Corugi, the structure of the clan, the nature of its members, and the loyalty of the new Icebear recruits to Corugi.
It became rapidly apparent that the clan was chaotic. Corugi was recruiting heavily from global. He was promoting everyone to Elder. There was no structure. There were no rules. People were donating anything (including wall breakers) or not at all. The recruits were young, inexperienced, and frequently inactive. We gauged then that many of the new recruits had no idea that their clan was even in a state of revolt.
Given that, we knew we could easily infiltrate the Icebears with yet more agents. We watched Corugi, and slowly but surely we drew our plans against him.
The next agent to infiltrate Icebears was the indefatigable Magnificio (or "Mags", as we so fondly call her). Her role was to play a sycophant, to help and assist Corugi in every way. To help new recruits, to donate often to make them stay, to pander to Corugi's ego, and to appear to hold a grudge against me and the Bear Empire. To that effect she even posted "hate" messages in our threads, telling us how bad we were and disrespecting us in general. We knew Corugi was active in the forums and we hoped he would read and be impressed by Mag's messages of disdain for us.
However, Mags real role was of course quite different. Along with KC99 she would monitor developments in the Icebears clan, but she would also work hard to ingrate herself with Corugi, gain his trust to such an extent that should he commit any mistake or lapse in judgement, she would be ready to pounce and take advantage of it.
BEAR COMMANDOS
Soon a crack team of elite Bear Commando agents had infiltrated Icebears. The fabulous 456 ( or "four" as I call her) quickly followed Mags. Her role was to act like a simple foot soldier, saying nothing much, just obeying. However 456's real role was of course quite different. Trained to black belt level in the art of lurking, 456 would silently observe the chat log, donate troops like a loyal member and support Mags in a logistics role, providing intelligent conversation whenever the level of mediocrity of chat in the clan began to drive Mags totally bonkers.
In a similar support role our agent, the invincible Manu was inserted into Icebears. He would play the role of a staunch Corugi supporter, attempting to beef up the new Icebear recruits for the forthcoming war, but the reality was quite different. He would be waiting in the wings, ready to help restore law and order once we were ready to retake the Icebears. We were now preparing to launch our counter offensive.
PROPAGANDA CAMPAIGN
We knew this war would involve as much winning the hearts and minds of the general population of the Icebear clan as defeating Corugi himself. To this effect the talented avatarist Leech designed a poster of Corugi, labelling him as a clan snatcher. Likewise vitriolic posts were made on the forums by the famous Rowan, denouncing Corugi for the villain he is.
MILITARY OFFENSIVE
The code name for the miltary offensive was called "Crimson Sky". This called for search and destroy missions by Bear Empire members against rebel bases. It was designed to spread panic and despondency among the Icebear members. HOLY FUDGE! Did you guys think this was serious? It was a complete sham, of course! "A military offensive"? LOL. As if we were really going to spend countless hours looking for an Icebear village just to inflict a 39% damage rate on some nub. Oh my aching sides! But there was a reason for this deception. We announced the formation of a special bear clan called Skybears which would specialise insearch and destroy missions against the rebel Icebear villages. The real role of Skybears of course was quite different. Skybears would be our new trophy hunting clan, lead by the esteemed Spechi, Skybears was designed to goad Corugi into forming another clan.
STRATEGY FOR SUCCESS
Our only chance of success lay in coaxing Corugi out of the Icebears clan. To this effect we knew we had to help him grow the Icebears clan to such numbers that it ran out of room to take any new recruits. We figured that if we could covertly add stability to the clan through the efforts of our agents who would also help recruit new members into Icebears, this might well induce Corugi into creating another clan. To assist this provoked Corugi with threats of military action, the creation of Skybears, the formation of alliances against him, and our propaganda efforts. Our agents within Icebears encouraged him to this end, urging him to expand, yet cleverly demeaning themselves so as not to appear too ambitious. We knew this would likely play to Corugi's swollen ego and his inflated sense of self importance. His clan was big, it expanded to near capacity within three days, but it was rotten to the core. Just one good kick and the whole rotten edifice would come crumbling down.
So our agents within Icebears tirelessly recruited more and more members into Icebears, for this they deserve an award. For they were recruiting from Global Chat, a seething cesspool containing the worse distillation of Humanity ever seen. Relentlessly our agents donated to the new recruits, feeding their insatiable hunger for troops, as a means for retaining these starving masses within the ranks of the Icebears. Relentlessly they fed Corugi's ego, telling him how much they hated the Bear Empire, but also voicing their fears that a terrible retribution would be visited upon the Icebears unless it too expanded into a multi-clan Empire.
OPERATION VIKING DAWN
It didnt take long for our plans to come to fruitition. Within an astonishing three days the Icebears clan had grown to nearly 50 members. The final phase of our plan was ready. In this final phase, Operation Viking Dawn, another team of crack Bear Commandoes would suddenly infiltrate Icebears, filling it to maximum capacity. Coinciding with this would be the announcement of totally fictitious accounts of successful raids on Icebear villages by the Skybears clan. This, we hoped would be the tipping point. In the early hours of the morning our crack bear Commandos, the indomitable Bob Fossil and the worthy Nicholas Cage joined Icebears. It was now full. We waited for Corugi to crack under the pressure.
THE CRUCIBLE
By this time Mags had received a private message from Corugi, thanking her for her support, and indicating he was going to form a new clan. The trap was set. Would the rat take the bait? We waited on the edges of our seats. Then the news was announced! Corugi was going to form a new clan called Pandabears, in honour of the member he had decided to "co-lead" it with. All this information was being relayed through our secret communication channels, Corugi had no idea he was being so carefully watched.
Who would Corugi choose to lead Icebears in his absence? For here now was what all our plans relied upon, all our efforts. Would Corugi trust those who had done so much to support and help him, or would he choose one of the rabble he had collected from Global chat? We waited, scarcely daring to draw breathe.
He choose Mags to lead the Icebears.
VICTORY! IN ALL BUT NAME!
Corugi then went and created Pandabears. He was still, to our knowledge, blissfully unaware of the magnitude of his mistake. He had now handed control of a full clan right back into the hands of one of our members! Immediately rejoicing filled the bear Empire Camps! The tyrant was deposed in all but name! But there remained one last chapter to be written in this harrowing tale.
RETRIBUTION SERVED UPON CORUGI
I soon joined Icebears upon hearing of Mags success. For a day we retained the appearance that all was as usual, Corugi obviously paid scant attention to the Icebears clans for he did not seem to notice that I was now listed among its members. To finish off this treacherous dog, Mags sent him a private message urging him to return to Icebears, declaring that Bear infiltrators were attempting to take it back. Corugi foolishly heeded her warning without first checking with anyone else in the clan. He arrived back, doubtlessly expecting to be re-promoted to Leader. Instead he found himself facing the retribution of the Bear Elders and myself. Mags immediately promoted me to leader and thus Corugi knew he was surely doomed. Swiftly we took him to the very highest cliff in the land, and, without a pillow, flung his rotten carcass off the edge and watched it splat upon the sharp and pointy rocks below.
So thus ended the greatest threat ever faced by the BEAR EMPIRE!
VICTORY WAS OURS!
BY THE GRACE OF THOR!
HAIL THE BEAR EMPIRE!
HAIL!
Masterful telling of the story Mike.
I'm proud to be a bear!!
Victory is ours !
Hail the bear empire !
Honours.
Certain Bear Empire members played a pivotal role in bring about the defeat of Corugi and the rebel Icebears clan. For this we are eternally grateful, and recognise their vital contribution to the war effort by honouring them with a special award.
For their role in bringing about decisive VICTORY in the Bear Empire Civil War, the following members are hereby granted the following BEAR EMPIRE IMPERIAL ORDER OF MERIT: "REVOLTING REBEL REVILER". These members are hereby granted the authority to carry the distinguished "RRR" after their names
Magnificio RRR
456 RRR
KC99 RRR
Manu RRR
Spechi RRR
Bob Fossil RRR
Nicholas Cage RRR
Tanys RRR
Rowan RRR
Leech RRR
Lord Loki RRR
Queen Phoebe RRR
Karthi RRR
All Hail these Heroes!
HAIL!
In addition there was one Bear Empire member who was centrally responsible for ensuring the demise of Corugi and thus delivering us VICTORY! For her tireless work and dedication to the Bear Empire we acknowledge the supreme effort of Magnificio (RRR) and award her the highest honour in the Empire. "Marvellous Magnitudinal Magnificence" (MMM)
ALL HAIL Magnificio (RRR) (MMM)
HAIL!
IN THE NAME OF THOR!
HAIL!
This is a pointless clan thread you are wasting space for people who need to recruit members.Mike, you are a tyrant and no wonder they rebeled you I'm glad they did
.