LEAKED Next Update: Magic Item Store

MAGIC ITEM STORE

Attachment 50587
ITEM: ROYAL EYE GLASSES
COST: 500 Gems
EFFECT: BK WIDER VISION
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your Barb King (BK) blind on defense. Your base can be under attack all around, and your BK will stay in the center picking His Immortal nose with His Question Mark.

So, these mideveal-looking spectacles will allow your BK to actually go after those pesky attackers who may be just 4 tiles away. It will also make your BK stop mistakenly bringing in those skunks inside the house thinking they are stray cats.

Attachment 50589
ITEM: ROYAL BULL TESTICLES
COST: 800 Gems
EFFECT: BK PRE-UPDATE POWER
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your BK a mortal weakling. Your supposed "Immortal Demigod" now has issues working His way past a Builder's Hut. And when an enemy Pekka pops out of the Clan Castle, your BK now looks back at you with reluctance.

So, these mideval steroids will allow your BK to have PRE-"Hero-Nerf Update" Hit Points and Attack Power. Except, SuperCell devs still don't like the idea of your Level 40 Immortal Demigod to be strong. So, Bull Testicles will only work on Tuesdays and Fridays between the hours of 11am-4pm GMT.

Attachment 50590
ITEM: HOG ARMOR
COST: 300 Gems
EFFECT: PRE-UPDATE HOGS VS GIANT BOMBS
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your mass hog army obsolete vs Town Hall 9 bases that have both giant bombs and Archer Queens. It was genuine fast-paced action requiring skill and foresight to place heal spells before your swarming hogs. You thought you had to kiss that goodbye.

This isn't really an item per say. But for 300 gems, your Hogs won't take 1.5x damage any more from giant bombs. SuperCell upholds a sacred trust to maintain game balance and to make sure no one uses mass-anything. So, to balance this powerful item, every time you 2 or 3 star a war map using mass hogs, a message will pop up at the end of your battles. It reads...

"SuperCell does not appreciate you training a mass hog army. SuperCell doesn't appreciate it at all. You are making SuperCell very sad. Very, very sad."

Legit it seems...

This...could actually work you know?

Nice.

.........

I find this immensely funny.

Bull testicles, the origional testosterone bootster

I can deal with this, bring it

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GrimFuture

Attachment 50590
ITEM: HOG ARMOR
COST: 300 Gems
EFFECT: PRE-UPDATE NORMALITY VS GIANT BOMBS
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your mass hog army obsolete vs advanced Town Hall 8 bases that have both giant bombs and Archer Queens. It was genuine fast-paced action requiring skill and foresight to place heal spells before your swarming hogs. You thought you had to kiss that goodbye.

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Idk what kind of advanced TH8 you have or have find, but I want my TH8 with an AQ too

Thanks Sorrowcat, I made the edit.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by GrimFuture

MAGIC ITEM STORE

Attachment 50587
ITEM: EYE GLASSES
COST: 500 Gems
EFFECT: WIDER VISION
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your Barb King (BK) blind on defense. Your base can be under attack all around, and your BK will stay in the center picking His Immortal nose with His Question Mark.

So, these mideveal-looking spectacles will allow your BK to actually go after those pesky attackers who may be just 4 tiles away. It will also make your BK stop mistakenly bringing in those skunks inside the house thinking they are stray cats.

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that is stupid we dont want him to be lurable

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by GrimFuture

MAGIC ITEM STORE

Attachment 50587
ITEM: EYE GLASSES
COST: 500 Gems
EFFECT: WIDER VISION
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your Barb King (BK) blind on defense. Your base can be under attack all around, and your BK will stay in the center picking His Immortal nose with His Question Mark.

So, these mideveal-looking spectacles will allow your BK to actually go after those pesky attackers who may be just 4 tiles away. It will also make your BK stop mistakenly bringing in those skunks inside the house thinking they are stray cats.

Attachment 50589
ITEM: BULL TESTICLES
COST: 800 Gems
EFFECT: PRE-UPDATE POWER
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your BK a mortal weakling. Your supposed "Immortal Demigod" now has issues working His way past a Builder's Hut. And when an enemy Pekka pops out of the Clan Castle, your BK now looks back at you with reluctance.

So, these mideval steroids will allow your BK to have PRE-"Hero-Nerf Update" Hit Points and Attack Power. Except, SuperCell devs still don't like the idea of your Level 40 Immortal Demigod to be strong. So, Bull Testicles will only work on Tuesdays and Fridays between the hours of 11am-4pm GMT.

Attachment 50590
ITEM: HOG ARMOR
COST: 300 Gems
EFFECT: PRE-UPDATE NORMALITY VS GIANT BOMBS
Let's face it. The "Hero Nerf Update" made your mass hog army obsolete vs Town Hall 9 bases that have both giant bombs and Archer Queens. It was genuine fast-paced action requiring skill and foresight to place heal spells before your swarming hogs. You thought you had to kiss that goodbye.

This isn't really an item per say. But for 300 gems, your Hogs won't take 1.5x damage any more from giant bombs. SuperCell upholds a sacred trust to maintain game balance and to make sure no one uses mass-anything. So, to balance this powerful item, every time you 2 or 3 star a war map using mass hogs, a message will pop up at the end of your battles. It reads...

"SuperCell does not appreciate you training a mass hog army. SuperCell doesn't appreciate it at all. You are making SuperCell very sad. Very, very sad."

---

This could......work